Police swoop on flower-picking children
18 March 2011
Police swooped last weekend as two tiny children were spotted committing an outrage against flowers in a public park.

Sienna Marengo, four, and her sister Olivia, six, were spotted picking daffodils in Whitecliff Park, Poole, last Sunday. No doubt fearing that the flower-picking could escalate into something far nastier, a member of the public called the police, who swiftly arrived in a squad car. The children were observed for twenty minutes before the police finally stepped in.

These beasts should be caged! Another outrageous crime is committed.

Their parents - who later complained about the "heavy handed" reaction - were told that they could face charges of criminal damage. They admitted that flowers had indeed been picked, and said "in the future we will leave them there" (the daffodils, presumably, not the children).

Dorset police said "we were told a significant amount of daffodils were being pulled out and thrown around". Stand by for more sensational revelations.